Even if I cannot come up with any good real world examples that provide you with design
patterns straight up, there are a few places to start.
The first is getting your head wrapped properly round the concepts. One book helping
you do this is Making reliable distributed systems in the presence of software errors
written by an Erlang Guru Joe Armstrong where explains Concurrency Oriented Programming
in a very accessible way. It is in fact a Ph.D. thesis, but do not let that scare you.
It is by far easier to read, and pleasant into the bargain, than most common text books.
Looking at actual systems normally means that you have to learn too much about the actual
language for it too make sense just to evaluate things. For Erlang the documentation
provides design methodology and behaviours(Erlang speek for design pattern libraries).
This will illustrate the design patterns most commonly used in this setting. And these
have proved to be effective in building large scale systems, i.e. millions of lines of code (comparable to a factor 4 to 10 of other languages such as Java) and milloins of concurrent processes running on one machine in distributed clusters of machines.
A recent example of a real live system is Facebook Chat.
For the other frameworks I cannot really help you I am afraid.