I want my Framework 4.7.2 code to use a library that targets netcoreapp3.1 Nuget indicates that the library is referenced, yet I do not see it in the list of references.
I think your looking for <TargetFrameworks>
so in this case:
<TargetFrameworks>netcoreapp3.1;net472</TargetFrameworks>
Please note you need a SDK-style csproj. I assume this in the case for you. If not, check How to upgrade csproj files with VS2017
See also the article about <TargetFrameworkVersion>:
This article shows the old way to specify a target framework. SDK-style projects enable different TargetFrameworks like netstandard. For more info, see Target frameworks.