It's not entirely clear to me what problem you are trying to solve. You always have to "hard-code" something since you need to define who can access what. Something is not out of the control system either if you decide it should be in, it really depends on your implementation.
For what you are trying to do, I would generally define an "owner" role then define an access such as:
"owner" can "delete" "resource"
So there has to be some programmatic part where you find out whether the user is indeed the owner or not. Usually, this can be done by associating each resource with, for example, an "ownerId" property. If userId == ownerId, then the role of the current user is "owner".