//Code sanitized to protect the foolish.
using System;
using System.Collections.Generic;
using System.Text;
using System.Reflection;
using System.Web.UI;
namespace Mobile.Web.Control
{
/// <summary>
/// Class used to work around Richard being a fucking idiot
/// </summary>
/// <remarks>
/// The point of this is to work around his poor design so that paging will
/// work on a mobile control. The main problem is the BindCompany() method,
/// which he hoped would be able to do everything. I hope he dies.
/// </remarks>
public abstract class RichardIsAFuckingIdiotControl : MobileBaseControl, ICompanyProfileControl
{
protected abstract Pager Pager { get; }
public void BindCompany(int companyId) { }
public RichardIsAFuckingIdiotControl()
{
MakeSureNobodyAccidentallyGetsBittenByRichardsStupidity();
}
private void MakeSureNobodyAccidentallyGetsBittenByRichardsStupidity()
{
// Make sure nobody is actually using that fucking bindcompany method
MethodInfo m = this.GetType().GetMethod("BindCompany", BindingFlags.DeclaredOnly |
BindingFlags.Instance | BindingFlags.Public | BindingFlags.NonPublic);
if (m != null)
{
throw new RichardIsAFuckingIdiotException("No!! Don't use the fucking BindCompany method!!!");
}
// P.S. this method is a joke ... the rest of the class is fucking serious
}
/// <summary>
/// This returns true if this control is supposed to be doing anything
/// at all for this request. Richard thought it was a good idea to load
/// the entire website during every request and have things turn themselves
/// off. He also thought bandanas and aviator sunglasses were "fuckin'
/// gnarly, dude."
/// </summary>
protected bool IsThisTheRightPageImNotSureBecauseRichardIsDumb()
{
return Request.QueryString["Section"] == this.MenuItemKey;
}
protected override void OnLoad(EventArgs e)
{
if (IsThisTheRightPageImNotSureBecauseRichardIsDumb())
{
Page.LoadComplete += new EventHandler(Page_LoadComplete);
Pager.RowCount = GetRowCountBecauseRichardIsDumb();
}
base.OnLoad(e);
}
protected abstract int GetRowCountBecauseRichardIsDumb();
protected abstract void BindDataBecauseRichardIsDumb();
void Page_LoadComplete(object sender, EventArgs e)
{
BindDataBecauseRichardIsDumb();
}
// the rest of his reduh-ndant interface members
public abstract string MenuItemName { get; set; }
public abstract string MenuItemKey { get; set; }
public abstract bool IsCapable(CapabilityCheck checker, int companyId);
public abstract bool ShowInMenu { get; }
public virtual Control CreateHeaderControl()
{
return null;
}
}
}
Update: The original author of the code has outed himself so I must give credit where it is due. Dan McKinley left the company I was with shortly after I started, and he talks more about the code, explaining some background and a few more "WTF's" that 'Richard' wrote.
