I really hate using STL containers because they make the debug version of my code run really slowly. What do other people use instead of STL that has reasonable performance for
If you're using Visual C++, then you should have a look at this:
http://channel9.msdn.com/shows/Going+Deep/STL-Iterator-Debugging-and-Secure-SCL/
and the links from that page, which cover the various costs and options of all the debug-mode checking which the MS/Dinkware STL does.
If you're going to ask such a platform dependent question, it would be a good idea to mention your platform, too...