Why can't we just make all methods and variables static, to save ourselves from the hassle of making objects?
You can. If you really wanted to, there is nothing stopping you1, 2.
However, that is not how Java was designed to be used. And you will find that your code base get increasingly hard to test and maintain as it gets larger (compared to OO code). And you will also find that other Java developers are liable to run away screaming if they are asked to read your code.
If you really cannot get your head around OO, and/or you cannot accept that OO's benefits out-weigh the "hassle of making objects", then you would be better off using another language. Pick one that is non-OO (like C, old-school BASIC) or that is more conducive to non-OO programming (C++ used like C, Python, Perl, etc.)
1 - "Besides, a determined Real Programmer can write FORTRAN in any language." is one of the best lines in "Real Programmers don't use Pascal."
2 - Actually, some Java APIs can only be used effectively if you create and use custom classes.