I want to use Node because it\'s swift, uses the same language I am using on the client side, and it\'s non-blocking by definition. But the guy who I hired to write the pro
This question belongs more on Server Fault but FWIW I'd say running Apache in front of Node.js is not a good approach in most cases.
Apache's ProxyPass is awesome for lots of things (like exposing Tomcat based services as part of a site) and if your Node.js app is just doing a specific, small role or is an internal tool that's only likely to have a limited number of users then it might be easier just to use it so you can get it working and move on, but that doesn't sound like the case here.
If you want to take advantage of the performance and scale you'll get from using Node.js - and especially if you want to use something that involves maintaining a persistent connection like web sockets - you are better off running both Apache and your Node.js on other ports (e.g. Apache on localhost:8080, Node.js on localhost:3000) and then running something like nginx, Varnish or HA proxy in front - and routing traffic that way.
With something like varnish or nginx you can route traffic based on path and/or host. They both use much less system resources and is much more scalable that using Apache to do the same thing.