I am looking for a better pattern for working with a list of elements which each need processed and then depending on the outcome are removed from
In C# one easy way is to mark the ones you wish to delete then create a new list to iterate over...
foreach(var item in list.ToList()){if(item.Delete) list.Remove(item);}
or even simpler use linq....
list.RemoveAll(p=>p.Delete);
but it is worth considering if other tasks or threads will have access to the same list at the same time you are busy removing, and maybe use a ConcurrentList instead.