I\'m looking to create the following:
A portable version of python that can be run on any system (with any previous version of python or no python installed) and have it
I'm not sure that working solely in Python is the way to go here. You might have better luck with Puppet of Chef, which are configuration tools that can be used to create a local environment. There is plenty of code out there to install virtualenv and python on just about any Linux plus OSX (probably not Windows though).
Your workflow would be to install chef or Puppet (your choice), run a script to install the Python you want, then enter a virtualenv and pip install any packages you might need.
Sorry this isn't as easy as virtualenv alone, but it is much more robust.